We all want to be happy don’t we? And we all have different ideas about how that might be achieved. Many people think along the lines that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, which means they believe they’ll only be happy when they’ve done this, gone there, met the right man or woman, or got the job which pays x-thousands of pounds a year, etc. But the curious thing is that truly happy people are not concerned with material riches. Nor do they angst over finding the perfect relationship. Somehow, even when facing challenges or ill-health, they still manage to be happy.
So how do they do it?
Simple. It’s all down to attitude. Your state of mind and well-being is governed by how you think. It’s about how you approach and manage all the things you have to contend with: your relationships, the families you are born into, the jobs you do and the myriad experiences that life brings you. Focusing on beliefs that you’re hard done by, misunderstood, or that generally, luck, abundance and good times don’t seem to happen for you, will inevitably damage your confidence, drag your spirits down and lead to low self-esteem, feeling sad, unappreciated and very possibly depressed. And, as I’m sure most of you are aware, the Law of Attraction teaches that if you allow your thoughts to be directed along these lines, you’re likely to attract more of the very things you don’t want to happen.
The good news is that you can be happy right now by changing your thinking and your attitude. You can choose to be happy – and generally speaking, the only person who’s going to stop you from doing that is you!
Happy people tend to have certain habits and attitudes which create a sense of peace in their lives and an equanimity to whatever comes their way. For they know that happiness comes from WITHIN. They’ve discovered that happiness is something that can be learned in just the same way as you might learn any other skill. By acquiring new habits and more positive ways of thinking, you can train yourself to do this.
Here’s a few suggestions about how to do it and I promise you, if you practice them, there’s every possibility of you becoming a happier person! So give it a whirl……..
Begin by thinking of all your problems as challenges. Instead of focussing on how difficult something is, turn it around and start looking at it as an opportunity for you to change and make your life better. Every challenge is a lesson to learn and a chance to grow and become all the stronger for it. There’s usually an upside to any issue if you’re prepared to look for it – so focus on that instead and make a commitment to eliminating the word “problem” from your vocabulary!
Don’t sweat the small stuff! Remember that whatever little thing is irritating you right now will be irrelevant in a year, a month or even a day, so why wind yourself up? Try saying to yourself: “I’m just going to put this on one side for now” and then get on with other things in your life. It’s easier than you think to do this.
Resolve to let go of grudges and be kind to yourself and others. Research has shown that this is a big factor in feeling happier. Kindness releases a powerful energy which helps to build relationships and fosters positive feelings for yourself and those around you.
Choose to spend time with friends who are positive because that way you’ll be buoyed up by their positive energy. Notice how frequently you make negative comparisons between yourself and others (whether you think you’re better or worse than them!) and consciously switch the way you’re thinking. Everyone is a unique individual and being judgemental in any respect is detrimental to your happiness. Also, don’t talk about plans, dreams and ideas to people who are negative because they’re likely to pull you down and tell you your ideas are pie in the sky and won’t happen. If you want an opinion, ask a positive person, and wean yourself off the need for approval from others.
You are what you eat, so make an effort to eat healthily. Processed junk foods will leave you feeling sluggish and prone to health problems so ditch the burgers, chips and pizzas and go for more fresh vegetables and fruits and try to buy organic produce whenever possible. Also remember that exercise produces endorphins (those happy hormones which are so healing for your body). Even walking for 30 minutes a day can enhance your state of mind, reduce stress, help to keep your weight down and make you feel happier.
If you’re not already doing it, learn to meditate. Research shows that it calms your nerves, is good for your health and supports inner peace. And practice more awareness of living in the NOW instead of dwelling on the past or worrying about the future.
Being able to express gratitude or appreciation for the things that you have has been found to help with stress, foster happier moods, more optimism and bring better health. It’s a good idea to start a “gratitude journal” where you write down all the things you’ve encountered each day for which you’re thankful. In this way you can begin training your mind to think in a more appreciative fashion.
And finally, remember nothing in life is ever going to be perfect. Happy people are able to accept what can’t be changed and instead put their energy into the things that they can control and are able to improve. So when change enters your life, resolve to accept it and see it as something really positive. And when you can’t change something, learn to accept that, too. Below is a simple little prayer which speaks beautifully about learning acceptance. You might like to copy it out and put it up somewhere as a reminder……
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.